Living with a roommate naturally requires setting some boundaries.
Those boundaries become even more important when you are also romantically involved with someone. There is nothing wrong with having a romantic relationship, but if you plan to bring your significant other into the shared living space, there are certain things to keep in mind regarding respect for both.
Shared Spaces
First and foremost, your apartment is not just yours. You should remember that each person needs a place they can go to at the end of the day where they feel safe and comfortable. Don’t be offended if your significant other is constantly there and your roommate isn’t comfortable with that. Your roommate is paying the bills too, and has a right to privacy.
You should also try to involve your roommate in your partner’s presence. No one likes to feel excluded in their own home. If your roommate is open to engaging with both of you, find some activities you can do together: watch a movie, go out to eat, or play trivia. Allowing a friendship to form between your roommate and significant other benefits everyone.
Respect Their Stuff
Do not allow your significant other to leave the place a mess. As with any other guest of yours, if he/she is messy, it is your job to clean up after them if they won’t. Don’t leave it there for your roommate to deal with.
Make sure your partner knows what food it yours and what is off-limits. If your roomie was already annoyed about your boyfriend encroaching on her personal space before, she will really be upset to know that he ate her leftovers!
Be a Problem-Solver
If conflict arises between you, your roommate, and significant other, talk it out. It is important that you don’t just sweep issues under the rug. You should be committed to solving potential problems and address them early so resentments aren’t built over time. This can be awkward at first, but it is best to make it a habit from the start.
Even so, the best way to prevent conflict of this nature is to be as respectful as possible of your roommate’s space. Keep in mind that a little courtesy can go a long way.
About the Author: Rachel Savering is a marketing student at Strayer University and will be graduating this spring with her Bachelor’s Degree. In addition to being a student, she is also in sales as an assistant manager and enjoys helping others. Rachel is passionate about writing as well as an outdoor enthusiast who enjoys hiking and running.
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